Communication & the Family Pet

You feed them, discipline them, love them, and sometimes you even sleep with them. No, I'm not talking about your kids or even your spouse; I'm talking about the family pet.

In the US the family pet often has near-equal status to other family members. Most of the time the couple finds acceptable ground rules for the pets' care and living arrangements. But occasionally the original pet parent has difficulty allowing the new adoptive parent to have a say in what those ground rules will be. And that can be the beginning of trouble in a relationship.

You have probably known of someone who flippantly states that if they had to choose between their pet and their partner that they would choose the pet. The pet parent may rationalize that they have had the pet for a long time and have thus become too bonded to allow their new love interest to come between them and their animal companion. They may worry that the pet is emotionally innocent and doesn't understand the owners' sudden shift in affections. This may be so, but if your date is willing to allow a pet to come between them and intimacy on a human level I advise you to get out now and move on to someone who shares your views of a pets' place in the home.

Now I am not saying that either position is right or wrong, I'm saying that a pet can be a very intimate member of a family, and like religious views and political orientation, having vastly differing views about a pets' place in the home can become a sore spot in even the strongest relationships.

So before jumping into an intimate human relationship, it would be wise to thoroughly discuss your views and expectations regarding the family pet.